What if I told you that you
are a work of art? You may be asking why I would call someone “art.” I took
the liberty of looking up a definition of the word to get a clearer
understanding. What I found was mesmerizing.
Art, noun; the creation of beautiful or significant things
You see, there is a big issue in today’s society. We don’t
see ourselves as an “art form,” we see ourselves as trash. Filthy. Worthless.
Empty. This blog post is aimed towards those who feel this way about themselves,
or even if you know someone who does. This isn’t a post aimed to put you down,
but I’m here to tell you how precious you are in God’s sight.
One of my favorite passages of scripture is something so
small, and overlooked. I guarantee you’ve read it before.
Genesis 2:7 “Then the Lord God formed man of dust from the
ground.”
How simple? But not really. The word “formed” here in Hebrew
is used to describe how a potter fashions moist clay into a beautiful vase
through an intricate process of shaping, squeezing, spinning and heating the
clay.
Wow.
We reflect God’s power, His majesty, His image, His
goodness, His creativity, and His love. We are to be cherished and admired.
I think a common misconception among people, especially
young people, is that we don’t see ourselves as made for a purpose. We see
ourselves as accidents; people with no value. I was one of those people before
I fell in love with Jesus. The difference between not being in love with Jesus,
and being completely in love with Him is this: purpose. In the world, you have
no purpose without God. We’re just the “walking dead,” roaming the earth for
absolutely no reason at all. (How depressing is that?) But, as a Christian, you
have purpose, you’re planned. I find
that to be so comforting, coming from someone who lived almost 18 years
thinking she was a mistake. God saw that there was a need, somewhere, somehow,
on this earth. So He envisioned a tall, blonde, silly girl with green eyes to
fulfill that need. Whether that was to bring someone to Christ, to change a
life, to write a blog to influence people, who knows. But I know that God made
me, no, He designed me carefully, intricately,
specifically for a purpose.
That means, when I look at myself in the mirror, I shouldn’t
see that my hair is in all the wrong places, I have a little acne appearing on
my chin, and that I’m gaining some weight. I should look in the mirror and feel
adored. I should see that God
designed me, He hand crafted me in ways I’m unable to comprehend.
We are regarded with rapturous love from a God who created
the air you breathe, who created the eyes you’re using to read
this. He looked into this earth and seen that it needed you.
God wants you. He loves you. Do you know how long I’ve
searched for a love like this? For 15 years. I was baptized into Christ for the
remission of my sins December 26, 2012. Ever since that day, my world was
beautifully shattered into a million pieces. I am a new creature. I am dead to
that girl who was scarred, tattered, and lost. I’ve found purpose. I’ve found
real, ardent love.
I’ve looked for this love in so many different ways. Every thing
I’ve came across has failed to the love I’ve found in my savior.
I’ll share something with you. I struggle with not having a
dad. A little girl needs her father, as a protector, as a rock. I don’t have
that.
This post is aimed to people who don't have a father. To those girls who cry when Father’s Day comes around, to
the guys who seek for love in all the wrong places, look up. Your earthly “dad”
may have left you, but if you’re covered with Christ, the Heavenly one hasn’t.
What I find amazing is that he never
will.
I cried Sunday morning.
I cried because I wanted a dad. I wanted someone to love me
so much like other girls have. I look around and see young teenage girls hugging their fathers, sitting next to each other in church. He'll tickle her, and she'll look up to him adoringly and explode with laughter.
It hurt me.
There was a song called “Nothing Without You” that we sang
for worship that morning. I started to sing, although there was a pain in my
chest. The lyrics are as follows.
“Take these hands and
lift them up,
for I have not the strength
to praise you near enough
for I have nothing
I have nothing without
you.
Take my voice and
pour it out
and let it sing the songs of mercy I have
found
for I have nothing
I have nothing without
you.
Tears filled my eyes, but I kept singing... until I quietly sang:
And all my soul needs
Is all your love to cover me
So all the world will
see
That I have nothing
without you…”
I couldn't hold it back any longer. There was a pang in
my chest and I buried my face into my hands and began to cry, uncontrollably. I
cried for all the times I’ve felt unprotected, for all the times I’ve felt
worthless, unneeded. My shoulders were shaking, mascara filled tears covered my
knees and my hands. I cried with my whole body. There was so much pain, desire,
and hurt in my heart that I’ve been holding in. But the realization that all I ever needed was God, hit me like a smack in the face.
All my soul needs, is
for all His love to cover me.
Because I don’t have a father to embrace me and protect me,
I have a fierce love for God. I have a ferocious need for Him, simply because
He is my Dad. I know that sounds silly, He’s not very often referred to as a “dad.”
But He’s mine. He protects me. He loves me. He created me. I owe my life to Him.
I want to do everything to please Him. Just like a child would to their father, I do so to mine. He fills my holes
marred from my parents. He fills the void that has taken over me. He made me
realize that I’m not ugly and damaged, I’m lovely and priceless.
So if you’re reading this, and you feel worthless, or if you
don’t have a father; whether he abandoned you like mine did, if he passed away,
or if you don’t receive what you need from your earthly father--read these
words. Hide them in your heart and don’t forget them. You’re loved more than
you can ever imagine. You have a Father. Your search is over.
I have finally found my Father. I have finally found self
worth. I hope you can, too.